Paper candidates asked to buck up

I just got an email from Dallas County LP chair Tim Lebsack, ending with this:

P.S.
the next time someone uses the phrase "but I'm just a paper candidate" in my face, I will be in prison and speaker will be in pain.

Remember, I love you and only want what's best for you and thank you for allowing me to vent.

If you are an LP candidate, please contact your local League of Women Voters at your earliest convenience. Never mind that your haven't been coached on how to answer the questions. You won't be punished for making a mistake.

If you quit the party because I've huuut youww feeewings, please continue to send your donations. We need the dues.

Zing.